Sushmita Sen says being a single mother is not easy and shares her struggles to adopt Alisah
"I had been trying since I was 22 to become a mom by the process of adoption. And they didn't allow it," shares an emotional Sushmita Sen.
In 1994, a 18-year-old tall and confident Sushmita Sen was crowned Miss Universe. With this feat, Sen became the first Indian woman to clinch the revered title.
Of course, there have been a few other ladies who managed it as well, but none as inspiring as this single mum of two. In the many years since she became Miss Universe, Sen accomplished a lot in life, inspired many single mums and proved that if one is determined enough, nothing can stop them from achieving their life goals.
It has been 23 years since Sen won the title in Manila, and her life recently took a full circle when she went back to adjudge the same competition. But that wasn't what caught out eyes. It was her admission that she may get married soon that intrigued people.
In an interview byJessica Soho, the charismatic and unabashedly candid Sen admitted that she'd get married soon. She also spoke about her struggles of becoming a mother and why she never thought of fellow mum Aishwarya Rai Bachchan as a competition.
On fellow mum Aishwarya Rai Bachchan
"She's not a conventional Indian gorgeous, she's an international gorgeous. So you'd look at her at 17.5 years and you're saying, "She's entering the pageant, okay next year, buy-bye, am not participating." she shared.
However she added that this attitude of hers irritated her mother.
"Oh my god! What a shouting I got from my mother that day. I came back home to "You are not my daughter. I cannot believe that you are that afraid to try and you want someone who's not a competition to be there to compete with you. Shame on you! Don't talk to me!" She was very mad at me," she shared.
"If you don't try, you'll never know." And I was standing at the airport when I won and I came back. And my mother standing there at the airport like, "I told you so!"
"Well, this is an important lesson. You have to give life a shot. I'm living proof of that," she says.
As an actor and a mother of two
The mum of two daughters also spoke about her struggles of becoming a single mother in India. She said, being a mother was "magical, tough, complicated, very human, it's like everyone else."
"Being a single mother is not easy. It's very romantic, but its not easy. Yes, that's true (went to court for my first daughter). I was 24-years-old and I had been trying since I was 22 to become a mom by the process of adoption. And they didn't allow it. It took us a while and we got the custody for my baby," she shared.
She also added that while it was still easier to adopt Renee, adopting Alisah was the real struggle.
"But the second child was actually a bigger court fight than the first one. Because in India, the rules said that you could not adopt a daughter after a daughter. You have to adopt a son. And I wanted to adopt a daughter, so 10 years I fought and then my Alisah came. It was a long wait," she shared.
As for her plans to get married, she has an important news to share with everybody.
Marriage on the cards soon
"I have been very attached, just not married. I don't know, I think we're all unique and we are somehow told by everyone else that this is the right age to get married. This is the right age to have children. This is the right age to retire. I just wanted to take life at my own clock because I believe everybody's unique. I came close to marriage twice. But, better sense prevailed I think. I will get married and I think in due course of time, I think that too will happen," she shared.
It seems that Sen is proving the old adage- "the older you get, the better it gets!" Sen has been in inspiration for many women and has taught out society a few lessons over the years.
- Teach daughters to believe in themselves: Just as Sushmita shared this wisdom with her own daughter Renee in an emotional letter, we must also teach our girls to trust themselves and follow their dreams. It's always too easy to give up, but it takes a fighter to strive.
- Age is just a number: If your daughter is ambitious, let her pursue her dreams. Never push children to follow your unfulfilled dreams and never let them believe that age is an important factor in how one must live. This also includes letting them decide the age they feel is right to get married or to have children.
- Be courageous: There are many obstacles that life presents itself with, but that mustn't deter you. Teach your daughters to have the courage to follow their dreams and pursue till they have achieved their goals.
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