We all know that it is never easy to console somebody whose spouse has just died, and it's even more difficult if that person is your own parent. The question is, how do you deal with the dilemma of lending emotional support to the bereaved parent and your own loss?
This is precisely what mum Shilpa Shetty Kundra must be going through!
The actor suddenly lost her father, Surendra Shetty to cardiac arrest last month and even bid a heartfelt adieu to him. She also organised the teravih ceremony that saw her entire family come together to 'celebrate' her father's illustrious life.
Shilpa bids goodbye to father
Not just that, a few days after her father's death, she was seen at the ghats of Ganga with sister Shamita Shetty and husband Raj Kundra, where the trio performed the asthi pravah ceremony for the Shetty patriarch.
In fact, the actor and mum of four-year-old Viaan Raj even posted a picture of the same and wrote: "At Rishikesh with family on the banks of Ganga. Dad is at one with the universe and his soul is closer to us than ever before. #soullivesforever #missyoudad #staystrong #attitude."
While everybody deals with grief differently, it seems that Shilpa has decided to take the mature route and be with her mother every step of the way. Being the eldest, she has been seen taking care of her mother and physically escorting her every time she steps out.
Continue reading to see how Shilpa Shetty Kundra actually brought her mum back to her Mumbai home after the asthi pravah ceremony.
Shilpa, the doting daughter
The working mum who wears many hats was determined to get back to her professional commitments and she also posted various cryptic messages on her Instagram account to share her thoughts on the loss of her beloved father.
One of them read: "One day you will realise that material things mean nothing, all that matters is the well-being of the people in your life." No wonder then, she has been making sure to spend time with her mother and physically escort her every time she steps out of the house.
She even took her to Rishikesh, where the family performed the asthi pravah ceremony for the Shetty patriarch.
Needless to say, while it must be a very difficult time for the family, but by virtue of being somebody in the limelight, Shilpa has managed to highlight how to console a bereaved family member, especially if it is a parent.
5 ways to help a grieving parent
Just as Shilpa is supporting her mother at this time of her need, one can also support a bereaved parent with patience and understanding. Here are a few things one can keep in mind and teach their kids the same as well:
- Attend to their physical needs: You and your bereaved parent would have different ways of dealing with the loss and this makes it important for you to be physically present to help with the grieving process. Both you and your parent would need rest and plenty of nutritious meals to go through the day, because by staying healthy you are better equipped to deal with emotional stress.
- Lend a supportive ear: Be patient and listen to your bereaved parent who may want to share anecdotes or stories about their spouse. This is a part of the grieving process for many people and they like to talk about those who have gone. This will help your parent let go of the past gradually, and feel that you are there to listen in and support them.
- Allow the parent to take their time: It is important to understand that everybody must be given time to get over a personal loss. Sometimes the surviving parent may deny that they are grieving, but by virtue of giving them a time window, you will allow the process of grief and this will help them in the long run.
- Remember important dates: Just because one of your parents is no more, it does not mean you try to erase their memory. In fact, you must do the exact opposite and remember important dates such as birthdays, anniversaries or any other personal dates that may hold importance to your surviving parent.
- Celebrate your parents' life: Just as Shilpa did for her father, one must remember to also celebrate the life that their parent lived while they were still alive. While mourning is a natural process, it is also important to remember the good times you've had with your parent.
By imbibing these basic methods, you can set an example for your own children, who will learn from your patience and support and perhaps emulate the same in the future.
Read: 10 valuable life lessons only a mother can teach
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(Image courtesy: Instagram)
