“The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new"
This beautiful saying by Indian spiritual teacher, Osho, is a wonderful reminder to all mums that your motherhood journey only began when your child came into this world, so it’s close to impossible to get it right from the very minute you held your baby in your arms.
Babies don’t come with instruction manuals and let’s face it, no amount of parenting books you read, prenatal classes you attended and (mostly unsolicited) advice you received could have truly prepared you for this wild and unpredictable roller coaster ride called parenthood.
According to the Real Mothers Heard survey conducted by Baby Dove in India, 70% of mums feel overwhelmed by the amount of information and advice they receive on how to be a parent and 73% sometimes wonder if what they are doing as a mother is good enough.
You will always be perfect in your baby’s eyes
A whopping 90% of Indian mothers feel pressured to be a perfect parent. Brand Baby Dove recognises that there is no perfect way of parenting and hence, there are no perfect mothers. So instead of striving for perfection, here’s an honest 3-step guide on how you can become a REAL mother instead:
1. Trust your maternal instinct
Baby Dove’s Real Mothers Heard Survey reveals that 66% of Indian mothers surveyed receive conflicting advice from their own mums and mothers-in-law, and 65% of them also feel that there are lots of old wives tales about how to bring up children that do not make sense.
67% of these mums also feel judged if they don’t follow traditional methods of parenting.
Family and friends may mean well and are just trying to help you out, but remember that ultimately you are the parent -- and like what most of these mums feel, only you will instinctively know what’s best for your child.
2. Take good care of yourself too
87% of Indian mothers feel the most amount of pressure and judgement from friends and family to look good, yet 7 out of 10 mothers feel they do not have enough time for themselves.
With all the things you do and have sacrificed for your family, it is important for you to also practice self-care without feeling any guilt.
Take some time to pamper yourself, go on a special date with your husband, or have a fun evening out with some friends to boost your mood -- a happy mother can actually have a positive effect on her children!
Just do the best you can, because that is more than enough!
Stop comparing yourself to others
Are you a Stay-At-Home-Mum who feels like she’s not contributing enough to her household and wish you could get a job like your best friend and earn a bit of money?
Or are you a Working Mum who feels bad for spending time away from your family and are envious of your sister who has the luxury of being with her children 24/7?
The Real Mothers heard survey by Baby Dove states that 67% of Indian mothers feel guilty sometimes about going to work rather than staying at home with their child and 61% feel that if they stayed at home, they would feel guilty about not providing for their family; yet 54% would like to go to work rather than being a Stay-At-Home-Mum.
Nobody truly has it all, no matter how great their life may seem – at one point or another, everyone else is also wondering if they’re a good enough parent.
Baby Dove believes that there is no such thing as a perfect mother, only real ones. Join the conversation at #trustyourway.
