5 things that will invite the wrath of breastfeeding mums

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Is your best friend breastfeeding? Or is your wife nursing your baby? Keep in mind these things to avoid friction in your relationship.

My bub turned one-month-old last week. He has been breastfeeding and is growing at his own pace. However, many people we met tend to ask uncomfortable questions about breastfeeding as conversation fillers. This ends up irritating my wife, who has the sweetest temperament of a dragon!

If you know someone who is breastfeeding, avoid these 5 things to escape the wrath of a nursing mum.

1# Commenting on the size of the baby

Curb the impulse to comment on the tiny size of a baby.

Size and weight of the baby is a sore spot for a breastfeeding mum, especially if the baby is tiny. In India, the 'bada bachha matlab healthy bachha' myth is deeply rooted.

I agree that babies look healthier if they are big. But that does not mean you should say it out loud. It reflects on the mum's feeding directly, and you don't want to hurt her feelings.

2# Inquiring about the supply

Breastmilk supply is a private affair between the baby and the mum. The mum, if she is not too ill, will produce enough milk to satisfy the thirst and the hunger of the baby.

The supply is maintained by a few hormones and it is adjusted daily. When the baby has a growth spurt coming, he will drink more often.

milk supply demand

So, avoid all impulses to casually touch the topic of breast milk supply, unless the mum volunteers any information. Talk about diapers instead. That is one good topic of conversation!

3# Asking if the baby is satisfied

In the first month, many children feed every hour. This is known as cluster feeding. We were discussing this with a few friends and one of them casually asked if it is really due to a growth spurt or is is because the baby is not really satisfied with the feed.

Most of the babies would not sleep hungry. Even new parents like us know this. Babies tend to sleep between 15 minutes to six hours, depending on their age and hunger.

So hold this question and talk about the review of Rustom instead.

What else should you not say to a breastfeeding mum? read on to find out

4# Commenting on the quantity of pumped breast milk

We heard this anecdote from a friend. Her maternity leave was about to end, and so she started pumping milk in the preparation for the transition. Her sister saw the quantity of the milk pumped out and blurted," bas itna? kam nahi padega?" My friend reminded her that she is a human and not a bhais.

Well, don't add to the stress of the transition. It would end up affecting the milk supply. Be encouraging. At the end of the day, this issue of quantity of milk is between the mum and the child.

5# commenting about breastfeeding in public

We have heard a lot of horror stories about mums being shamed because they breastfed in public. Ironically, this shaming is done by other women more often than not. As a guy, I do not understand the psyche behind this.

There is a child, having his lunch, and there is a mum who is pyar se feeding the baby. Where do you fit into the equation?

 

public feeding

If we talk about modesty, Indian mums use shrouds or pallus to cover up unlike occidental mums. Even in their case, I honestly don't see a reason for such despicable reaction.

If you are walking and spot a breastfeeding mum, and if that makes you uncomfortable, keep on walking! There is literally no need to disturb the mum and the baby. If one of your close friends is feeding and that is making you uncomfortable, start playing candy crush on your phone. Before you know, the baby would be fed and burped!

Also read: 7 Myths about breastfeeding that every parent should know

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(Images, courtesy Insufferableintolerance.com, Essentialparent.com)

Written by

Anay Bhalerao

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