15 hilarious tweets married couples can surely relate to
Good marriages aren’t only filled with love but a great sense of humour. And there is no shortage of people who totally just get this on twitter.
"Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life."
Good marriages aren’t only filled with love but a great sense of humour. And there is no shortage of people who totally just get this on twitter. We’ve rounded up the funniest, and most on-point tweets that are sure to crack up married couples.
Me: Look, I love you, But I made exactly the amount of cheese & crackers I want to eat right now.
Wife: But I only…
Me: EXACTLY the amount
— keith (@tchrquotes) November 4, 2014
Marriage is basically just whispering, “Are you awake? I need to show you this cat video.”
— Mel Evans (@mel_evans) February 22, 2016
The best thing about being married is having someone who can tell you if something is disgusting or not…
— Boyd’s Backyard (@TheBoydP) February 24, 2016
Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life.
— ⚡️QUΞΞN ΔLΔNΔ⚡️ (@AlanaRockz) November 16, 2015
Today’s my husband’s birthday, so…
*flips coin to see if I should shave above the knee*
— Ashley Austrew (@ashleyaustrew) January 29, 2016
You pee too loud.
— KC of TX (@kcmoore51) February 12, 2016
[runs to the door to greet wife]
I’m afraid there’s been a terrible accident involving all the things you asked me to do today.
— David Hughes (@david8hughes) February 28, 2016
Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn’t wanna share.
— Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) December 30, 2015
[rolls over in bed and whispers to wife]
“I ate like 75 chicken nuggets today”
— Rocky Momax (@rockymomax) February 16, 2016
Me: Wait, so it’s cool for you to use my phone charger but I can’t touch yours?
— Rock (@TheMichaelRock) January 28, 2016
It’s 3pm and my husband and I are still sitting in bed waiting for the other to get up and make coffee this morning.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) February 14, 2015
Wife: You pick dinner.
Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT?!
Wife: It’s up to you.
— Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 22, 2016
Marriage is like coffee. First it’s really hot. Then it’s just right. Then it helps you get off your ass and do things.
— Josh Hara (@yoyoha) February 10, 2016
Marriage Morning Ritual Year One: *kiss*. I love you!
Year Five: Have a great day! *air kiss*
Year Ten: Grunt; stumbles out the door.
— Stacey Sordahl (@DrunkAtThePTA) February 25, 2016
Marriage is essentially just having somebody who you can have regular conversations with while one or both of you are stark naked.
— lauren robinson (@laurenjoyness) September 15, 2015
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